This week's reading has been great and impacted my life in a way I find it hard to believe. I did a lot of evaluation and self introspection. Growing up as a last-born made me to be a little bit inconsiderate of other people. When I was in my teen years, my siblings had already moved out of my parent's house. I was left with my mother and that made me to think of myself only. My mom shared with me with almost anything she had. When my siblings visited they did the same thing of sharing with me only. Whereas my husband was an older brother to his siblings. He basically was forced to share and he learned that at a younger age.

Getting married became a different dynamic for me. I had to be considerate and learn to share and make sacrifices, which was not easy. I remember, we would draw up a budget and then I would have to go and do the shopping. I used to buy what I wanted and liked. Did not think of him at all. Do my hair and buy myself clothes. This one time, he politely told me how he felt about me not thinking of him. I explained to him why I did that and he helped me on how to be a better sharer. I also learned about making sacrifices in marriages. For me I sacrificed my dreams, I wanted to study in a varsity and stay on campus. Because I got married before I went to a university, I changed my goals. It did not feel right to be separated from my husband. I had to change my dream career choice and choose something less demanding. I am a stay at home wife because his job requires him to travel a lot. Sacrificing these things was not easy but very rewarding and I wouldn't change them. Though at first, I felt like I had no longer have a purpose. I love how marriage taught me to be considerate and be more selfless, it truly is rewarding no regrets whatsoever. 

So friends any sacrifices you had to make or what marriage has taught you? 

Hello everyone

I truly enjoyed this week reading and it made me to evaluate my own way of doing things. I loved the part of happy marriages are built on good friendships. A question was asked to think of a best friend and my mind went straight to a very good friend of mine who is not my husband. Then later I learnt the importance of making our partners to be our best friends and I felt so embarrassed and it did hit me that it is crucial for our partners to e our best friends as well. In my mind I never thought our relationship should go that beyond, I do not know maybe it is a cultural thing, be that it may it is not too late to change it.

I was chatting with a friend of mine who got divorced; she said something about the temple marriage did not do any good for her. She said she was miserable and neither did the gospel helped her in her problems. This week I read a book about “drawing marriage in our marriages.” on my side I truly believe as we live the gospel more fully our marriages could be saved and escaped the adversary. I know from experience if I do not read the scriptures and pray I become distant in my marriage and by doing these things with my husband helps us to have the spirit of the Lord. That spirit helps us to be kind and more loving to one another. There was a time when we were in a dark space because we had a miscarriage. We were angry with God on how it happened. I almost died and asked God why would I lose my baby and still almost lose my life. I stopped praying, reading scriptures and paused any contact with the Lord. That time Satan was telling me all sorts of negativity, which drove me into depression. I had to go for counselling, but never did help. A prompt came to my mind to pray and read about the atonement of Jesus Christ. As I did that, that dark cloud hanging over that and me slowly diminished made me to realize that the gospel is all that we need to survive in anything.

Hello everyone

I truly enjoyed Elder Hafen’s thoughts on marriage and how much Satan is after it. I get those feelings as well when I see people getting married. I remember on our sealing day, everything was just so perfect; there was never a doubt on my mind that I made a wrong choice. At that time, I had friends who were already married, they were just so happy for me and kept saying marriage is awesome. That was what made me to look forward to. Few months after our sealing things became intense, as there was a lot going on that made funny and us to argue enough my husband called it quits. I quickly asked my friends, why they never said anything about its challenges. They laughed at me and said welcome to the real adult world. That made me to be very sad, as I had wished they at least given me some glimpse of the sour part. From that day, I told myself I would share the good and bad times of marriage with my friends, especially the ones who asked. Please do not get me wrong, I am not trying to scared them, but rather enlightening them that marriage is not always bliss and sweet. There was a time I was asked to my experience about marriage on a Young Single Adult class. As I prayerful pondered what to share, I was prompted not to leave the part of its challenges and how to work hand in hand with your partner in conquering them. After I shared my experience, almost all of them were so thankful for my authenticity. They said most married couples only told them of the honeymoon phase. By the way, my husband is still with me as he was just feeling overwhelmed by how quickly things changed into sweet to sour.

Satan is truly on a mission to break marriages and most of the time he succeed. Just like what Elder Hafen said, that there are wolves in marriages and if we are not working together we will fall into those traps. I believe working together and putting God first could help us be protected from them. I know from experience if my relationship with God is compromised, I become not so nice to my partner. Being on the Lords side helps a lot.

Let me know if you want the talk, shout out.

Hello, Dumelani, Nda, Molweni, Sanibonani.☺